Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
