He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
