Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
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puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
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So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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