i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Randomize