You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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