don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
