Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Randomize
