I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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