I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
splinters make it hard to masturbate
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
