East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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