I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize