I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
