Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize