There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
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