covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Randomize
