If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
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