remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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