DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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