Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
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