Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Randomize
