im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize