Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
