I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
