K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Randomize
