She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize