Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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