How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
