Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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