I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize