he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
