Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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