Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
just come out here and I will go home with you...
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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