Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
