I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
