Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
