i think i have herpe
just one?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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