are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
