There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
