My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I just gift wrapped bread.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
