My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
It's never too late to be topless.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
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