Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
