Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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