I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Randomize