I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
