Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize