all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
