I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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