Capitaan dildo arrescate!
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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