the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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