I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
