I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Randomize